1Warning: 2 The fortunes contained in the fortune database have been collected 3 haphazardly from a cacophony of sources, in number so huge it 4 boggles the mind. It is impossible to do any meaningful quality 5 control on attributions, or lack thereof, or exactness of the quote. 6 Since this database is not used for profit, and since entire works 7 are not published, it falls under fair use, as we understand it. 8 However, if any half-assed idiot decides to make a profit off of 9 this, they will need to double check it all, and nobody not involved 10 of such an effort makes any warranty that anything in the database 11 bears any relation to the real world of literature, law, or other 12 bizzarrity. 13 14==> GENERAL INFORMATION 15 By default, fortune retrieves its fortune files from the directory 16/usr/share/games/fortune. A fortune file has two parts: the source file 17(which contains the fortunes themselves) and the data file which describes 18the fortunes. The data fil always has the same name as the fortune file 19with the string ".dat" concatenated, i.e. "fort" is the standard fortune 20database, and "fort.dat" is the data file which describes it. See 21strfile(8) for more information on creating the data files. 22 Fortunes are split into potentially offensive and not potentially 23offensive parts. The offensive version of a file has the same name as the 24non-offensive version with "-o" concatenated, i.e. "fort" is the standard 25fortune database, and "fort-o" is the standard offensive database. The 26fortune program automatically assumes that any file with a name ending in 27"-o" is potentially offensive, and should therefore only be displayed if 28explicitly requested, either with the -o option or by specifying a file name 29on the command line. 30 Potentially offensive fortune files should NEVER be maintained in 31clear text on the system. They are rotated (see caesar(6)) 13 positions. 32To create a new, potentially offensive database, use caesar to rotate it, 33and then create its data file with the -x option to strfile(8). The fortune 34program automatically decrypts the text when it prints entries from such 35databases. 36 Anything which would not make it onto network prime time programming 37(or which would only be broadcast if some discredited kind of guy said it) 38MUST be in the potentially offensive database. Fortunes containing any 39explicit language (see George Carlin's recent updated list) MUST be in the 40potentially offensive database. Political and religious opinions are often 41sequestered in the potentially offensive section as well. Anything which 42assumes as a world view blatantly racist, mysogynist (sexist), or homophobic 43ideas should not be in either, since they are not really funny unless *you* 44are racist, mysogynist, or homophobic. 45 The point of this is that people have should have a reasonable 46expectation that, should they just run "fortune", they will not be offended. 47We know that some people take offense at anything, but normal people do have 48opinions, too, and have a right not to have their sensibilities offended by 49a program which is supposed to be entertaining. People who run "fortune 50-o" or "fortune -a" are saying, in effect, that they are willing to have 51their sensibilities tweaked. However, they should not have their personal 52worth seriously (i.e., not in jest) assaulted. Jokes which depend for their 53humor on racist, mysogynist, or homophobic stereotypes *do* seriously 54assault individual personal worth, and in an general entertainment medium 55we should be able to get by without it. 56 57==> FORMATTING 58 This file describes the format for fortunes in the database. This 59is done in detail to make it easier to keep track of things. Any rule given 60here may be broken to make a better joke. 61 62[All examples are indented by one tab stop -- KCRCA] 63 64Numbers should be given in parentheses, e.g., 65 66 (1) Everything depends. 67 (2) Nothing is always. 68 (3) Everything is sometimes. 69 70Attributions are two tab stops, followed by two hyphens, followed by a 71space, followed by the attribution, and are *not* preceded by blank 72lines. Book, journal, movie, and all other titles are in quotes, e.g., 73 74 $100 invested at 7% interest for 100 years will become $100,000, at 75 which time it will be worth absolutely nothing. 76 -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love" 77 78Attributions which do not fit on one (72 char) line should be continued 79on a line which lines up below the first text of the attribution, e.g., 80 81 -- A very long attribution which might not fit on one 82 line, "Ken Arnold's Stupid Sayings" 83 84Single paragraph fortunes are in left justified (non-indented) paragraphs 85unless they fall into another category listed below (see example above). 86Longer fortunes should also be in left justified paragraphs, but if this 87makes it too long, try indented paragraphs, with indentations of either one 88tab stop or 5 chars. Indentations of less than 5 are too hard to read. 89 90Laws have the title left justified and capitalized, followed by a colon, 91with all the text of the law itself indented one tab stop, initially 92capitalized, e.g., 93 94 A Law of Computer Programming: 95 Make it possible for programmers to write in English and 96 you will find the programmers cannot write in English. 97 98Limericks are indented as follows, all lines capitalized: 99 100 A computer, to print out a fact, 101 Will divide, multiply, and subtract. 102 But this output can be 103 No more than debris, 104 If the input was short of exact. 105 106Accents precede the letter they are over, e.g., "`^He" for e with a grave 107accent. Underlining is done on a word-by-word basis, with the underlines 108preceding the word, e.g., "__^H^Hhi ____^H^H^H^Hthere". 109 110No fortune should run beyond 72 characters on a single line without good 111justification (er, no pun intended). And no right margin justification, 112either. Sorry. For BSD people, there is a program called "fmt" which can 113make this kind of formatting easier. 114 115Definitions are given with the word or phrase left justified, followed by 116the part of speech (if appropriate) and a colon. The definition starts 117indented by one tab stop, with subsequent lines left justified, e.g., 118 119 Afternoon, n.: 120 That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted 121 the morning. 122 123Quotes are sometimes put around statements which are funnier or make more 124sense if they are understood as being spoken, rather than written, 125communication, e.g., 126 127 "All my friends and I are crazy. That's the only thing that 128 keeps us sane." 129 130Ellipses are always surrounded by spaces, except when next to punctuation, 131and are three dots long. 132 133 "... all the modern inconveniences ..." 134 -- Mark Twain 135 136Human initials always have spaces after the periods, e.g, "P. T. Barnum", 137not "P.T. Barnum". However, "P.T.A.", not "P. T. A.". 138 139All fortunes should be attributed, but if and only if they are original with 140somebody. Many people have said things that are folk sayings (i.e., are 141common among the folk (i.e., us common slobs)). There is nothing wrong with 142this, of course, but such statements should not be attributed to individuals 143who did not invent them. 144 145Horoscopes should have the sign indented by one tab stop, followed by the 146dates of the sign, with the text left justified below it, e.g., 147 148 AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) 149 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You 150 lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be 151 careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes over 152 and over again. People think you are stupid. 153 154Single quotes should not be used except as quotes within quotes. Not even 155single quotes masquerading as double quotes are to be used, e.g., don't say 156``hi there'' or `hi there' or 'hi there', but "hi there". However, you 157*can* say "I said, `hi there'". 158 159A long poem or song can be ordered as follows in order to make it fit on a 160screen (fortunes should be 19 lines or less if at all possible) (numbers 161here are stanza numbers): 162 163 11111111111111111111 164 11111111111111111111 165 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222 166 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222 167 22222222222222222222 168 33333333333333333333 22222222222222222222 169 33333333333333333333 170 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444 171 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444 172 44444444444444444444 173 44444444444444444444 174 175 176